A guide to 2017
That's 2016 almost done and dusted, although there's still a few weeks left to make things even worse!
Prediction is a mugs game, but hey, it's almost 2017 and I've read the mystical tea bag to see what lies in store:
1. Theresa May loses her fight against the Supreme Court, and Brexit is put under due consideration by both houses but continues nevertheless.
2. As little Englanders celebrate, the big financial companies follow through plans to shift to Europe - as do major pharmaceutical/automotive/engineering companies.
3. The pound continues to drop in value, having the unexpected effect of reversing immigration as it's no longer worthwhile coming here.
4. The health service, farming and hospitality industries all lose key workers as the incredibly talented and hard working Eastern Europeans; and those UK natives that can, follow the money back to Europe.
5. Labour are wiped out by a UKIP landslide as an ineffectual press fail to take media-savvy politicians to task.
6. As the situation in the UK worsens, Theresa is removed from power by another clique of backstabbing Tories, but too late to save them from political suicide as a clueless Boris takes over at No 10.
7. Scotland and NI leave the UK and re-join Europe, as the best and brightest migrate to join them.
8. Meanwhile, over the pond, Donald gets his little hands on the levers of power and for a short while the USA does very well with shale gas, oil and coal all producing at record levels.
9. Environmental disaster hits the American breadbasket, resulting in the partial breakdown of social structures as well-armed citizens take what they want after they realise those in charge have been filling their pockets.
10. Sir David Attenborough gives one last appeal to save what's left of the planet as China and Russia take advantage of a divided and distracted world to expand influence and control.
Happy 2017 everyone!